Severe Problems With Anger

Does Your Child Have Severe Problems With Anger, Biting, & Hitting?  We all have feelings of anger and aggression, and so does your child.  These impulses are normal and healthy.  As a toddler or preschooler, your youngster may lack the self-control to express his anger peacefully. Instead, he may naturally lash out, perhaps hitting or biting in frustration.  When this happens, he needs you to take control for him and to help him develop judgment, self-discipline, and the other tools he needs in order to express his feelings in more acceptable ways.

While occasional outbursts are normal in youngsters, especially during temper tantrums, it is not normal for a child to have frequent rages in which he attacks others or himself. Most children get angry at others only when they are provoked. Unless they are very tired or overstressed, they usually can be distracted or consoled, and will quickly forget their anger. They may cry, argue, or yell, but they resort to violence only when they are extremely frustrated.

Some children are supersensitive, easily offended, and quickly angered. Many of these youngsters have been tense and unusually active since birth. They are often more difficult to soothe and settle as infants. Beginning in the preschool years, they show signs of becoming violent toward other children, adults, even animals. They often lash out suddenly and for no apparent reason, and may seem to be touchy or irritable most of the time. Even if they hurt someone in their anger, they rarely are sorry, and never feel responsible for the incident. Instead, they blame the other child for "making me angry," as if this excuses their own actions.

Your child might go through a brief period of this kind of behavior if he's particularly worried, tired, or overstressed, but if it continues for more than a few weeks, consult your pediatrician. If it becomes a routine daily pattern for more than three to six months, it should be viewed as a serious problem.

This extreme form of aggressive behavior can lead to serious social and emotional problems if allowed to continue. The child eventually loses all his friends, which makes him even more tense and irritable, and seriously damages his self-esteem. There is always the danger that he will seriously injure himself or others, and the problems will multiply when he reaches school age. Then his violent behavior may cause him to be suspended or expelled from school. Because he has so little self-esteem, he may later become self-destructive, abuse drugs or alcohol, become accident-prone, or even attempt suicide.

No one knows exactly what causes conduct disorder. The problem may lie in the child's biological makeup, the relationships within the family, or a combination of the two. In many cases other members of the child's family behave violently and the atmosphere within the family is tense and stressful. In some cases, however, there is no clear explanation for the child's behavior.

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